The Watsons Go to Birmingham – 1963

“It’s no wonder the neighbors called us the Weird Watsons behind our backs.” 

Kenny reflects on what his family must look like to the neighborhood as Dad, Momma, Kenny, and Joey stand looking at Byron stuck to the car mirror, uncertain what to do. This line in Kenny’s interior monologue suggests that this is not the first time something out of the ordinary has happened to them as a family.

“But I was kind of surprised that God would send a saver to me in such raggedy clothes.” 

Here, Kenny means “savior,” a concept he learned at Sunday school. He is eager to be saved from teasing and bullying even if it is at the new student’s expense; Kenny sees great potential in Rufus’s appearance and demeanor as targets for students like Larry Dunn. Soon, though, it becomes clear that Rufus sees Kenny as a friend, and Kenny realizes he likes having a friend in Rufus as well.

“I thought you was different.” 

Kenny laughs inadvertently when Larry Dunn teases Rufus and Rufus’s brother Cody for sharing clothes. Rufus is hurt by Kenny’s reaction and avoids Kenny at school; he also stops coming over to Kenny’s house to play. Kenny tells Momma, who intervenes; she encourages Rufus to accept Kenny’s apology, which Rufus does.

“I’ve got to admit, Joey didn’t do any more whining when she had to get into her winter clothes.” 

Kenny tentatively seeks Byron’s help with the problem of Momma’s winter clothing layers, telling Byron that he (Kenny) and Joey are the only two students who have to dress so warmly for the trip to school. Byron takes the opportunity to sell Joey and Kenny a lengthy explanation on their susceptibility to freezing temperatures because they have half-Southern blood; hundreds of other Southerners freeze solid overnight in Flint and have to be collected by garbage trucks. Joey cries at the image Byron presents and stops complaining about her winter layers.

“I wished I hadn’t told Byron about what happened, I wished I just could have gone the rest of the year with one glove.” 

Kenny feels guilt and regret over telling Byron that Larry Dunn stole his gloves because Byron’s reaction is mean and harsh. Byron not only retrieves the gloves, but also whacks Larry in the head and face to get him to listen; then, after Kenny gets the gloves back, Byron throws Larry into a chain link fence multiple times, saying that Larry is the carp trying to escape a net in a pretend movie Byron is making. Kenny and Rufus leave the scene because Kenny cannot watch.

“Momma was carrying a piece of paper towel, a jar of Vaseline and a Band-Aid in one hand and a fresh, dry book of matches in the other.”

Momma catches Byron playing with matches in the bathroom and intends to make good on her promise to burn Byron as punishment. Joey, Kenny, and Byron are all afraid of Momma’s appearance and demeanor in this scene; she hisses her words, and her eyes are cruel slits. Joey saves Byron by repeatedly blowing out the match Momma lights to burn Byron’s fingers.

“That night Byron had to deal with Dad. No picnic, but a lot better ending to his Nazi parachutes movie than Captain Byron Watson Gets Captured and Burned Alive by the Evil Snake Woman with His Own Flamethrower of Death.” 

Momma gives up trying to punish Byron because Joey saves him from being burned. Kenny reveals that Byron faced punishment from Dad, though he does not reveal what it was. Momma is the Evil Snake Woman in this pretend movie title.

“Whoever heard of cheese coming in a box as big as a loaf of bread?” 

Byron is incensed at the thought of Momma “sneaking” into family meals food products received by assistance, like cheese and powdered milk, which he refers to as “welfare food.” Byron is happy with the credit system at Mitchell’s groceries, however, in which he or Kenny can sign for grocery items without cash. Byron signs for two bags of cookies this way.

“I don’t know, I really wished I was as smart as some people thought I was, ’cause some of the time it was real hard to understand what was going on with Byron.” 

This is Kenny’s thought in interior monologue after he discovers the grave of the bird Byron killed. Byron is so upset by the bird’s death at his hands that he vomits all the cookies he put on credit at the grocery store. Kenny does not understand how Byron can so callously harass younger kids at school but cry and mourn for the bird.

“He’s whistling ‘Straighten Up and Fly Right’ and cutting all of Byron’s hair off!” 

Kenny tells Momma what he witnessed by peeking under the bathroom door. Byron’s new hairstyle disappears under Dad’s scissors and razor. Momma and Dad warned and threatened Byron not to get his hair chemically straightened and dyed, but Byron did it anyway, thinking his parents could not do anything about the “permanent” new hairstyle.

“And that was it. We thought that was the end of Byron’s Latest Adventure until a week later when Dad brought home the TT AB-00 in the Brown Bomber.”

Dad and Momma call Grandma Sands the night Byron loses his hair, but Kenny does not know why. Momma and Dad plan to have Byron live in Birmingham for the summer and possibly the next school year, but they keep the plan a secret as Dad goes about fixing up the car for the long road trip.

“Momma and Dad had threatened to send Byron to Grandma Sands about a million times but we never thought it would happen.” 

When Momma and Dad finally reveal the plan to drive to Alabama to drop off Byron for the summer, Kenny and Joey are surprised. Byron is miserable and runs into the house. Up to now, the children assumed a stay in Birmingham was unrealistic because of the distance and because of Grandma Sands’s rumored strictness.

“Well, that’s what being a grown-up is like. At first it’s scary but then before you realize, with a lot of practice, you have it under control.” 

Before the family leaves for Birmingham, Kenny finds Dad sitting in the car playing music early in the morning. They discuss the decision to send Byron away, and Kenny states how difficult and scary being a parent and grownup seems. Dad compares the growing-up process to the way Kenny used to steer the Brown Bomber on Dad’s lap.

“Uh, could someone check that ‘Watsons Go to Birmingham’ book and see who’s supposed to be holding Joey’s leaking head for the first hundred miles in Ohio?” 

Byron makes this quip as the Watsons’ road trip gets underway and Joey falls asleep in the backseat, stretched out across Byron’s and Kenny’s laps. She tends to drool in her sleep, hence the “leaking head” description. Byron is lightly poking fun at Momma’s use of the notebook she made with plans and details on food, mileage, and site information. Momma and Dad laugh at Byron’s joke, and Kenny wonders why bullies make excellent comedians.

“I think we’ve got our fingers in God’s beard and as we drive along we’re tickling him.” 

After a nerve-wracking rest stop in the darkness of the Appalachian Mountains, the family members enjoy the cool air of nighttime driving, windows down and hands out. Dad makes this remark to describe how the air feels on their hands. True to form, Byron reacts by pretending that Dad’s idea makes him nauseous.

“Eighteen hours in a car can age a kid forty years.”

Dad opts to drive straight through from Flint to Birmingham, only stopping briefly at rest stops; he does not sleep at all. Once the family wakes on the second morning of their trip, Dad talks in a steady stream about how he stayed awake, how the other family members fell asleep frequently, and what he thought of the kids’ appearance in the rearview mirror.

“The only kid that acted like he was having any fun was Byron.” 

Once in Birmingham, Kenny finds the heat sweltering and has difficulty feeling awake. He notices on the way to scope out some fishing holes with Dad and Mr. Robert that Byron is actively engaged in conversation with them and seems to be having a good time. This puzzles Kenny, who anticipated Byron’s typical troublesome behavior.

“If y’all are going to the water you stay away from Collier’s Landing.” 

Grandma Sands tells Byron, Joey, and Kenny to steer clear of the dangerous whirlpool that killed Miss Thomas’s boy Jimmy. Kenny decides, however, that he is old enough for a “Fantastic Adventure” of his own and goes to Collier’s landing without his siblings. Byron saves him from drowning minutes later.

“What’s wrong with you? When are you going to start acting like you normally do? What would Buphead say if he saw you acting like this?” 

Kenny voices his frustration with Byron’s actions and words just before he leaves Byron and Joey to go to Collier’s Landing on his own. Kenny cannot understand why Byron’s attitude has improved so drastically since arriving in Birmingham. He is disappointed that Byron does not want to go along and see the place where a boy drowned.

“There’s one good thing about getting in trouble: It seems like you do it in steps.” 

Reflecting on the “trouble” he finds himself in, Kenny realizes he could have avoided almost drowning in the whirlpool if he had made a different decision at any of the “steps” along the way: at the signposts, at Byron’s request, at the warning at Collier’s Landing, or before getting in the water. He chose unwisely at each step and only survives because Byron saves him.

“I saw Momma and Dad and Byron holding on to each other, all three of them looking like they were crazy and trying to keep each other away from the pile of rocks that used to be the front of the church.” 

Kenny arrives at the scene of the church bombing after he sees everyone in Grandma Sands’s neighborhood running in that direction. Momma, Dad, and Byron do not see him, and they do not know that he enters the church. Back home in Flint, he tells only Byron that he went inside.

“A bell went off in my head! The Wool Pooh had missed Joey! He wasn’t having much luck at all with any of the Weird Watsons!” 

Kenny finally understands that Joey is alive when she comes near and sits beside him on his bed at Grandma Sands’s house after the bombing. Up to this moment, he believed that the Wool Pooh got Joey because he (Kenny) let go and walked out of the church. He thought she was only back at Grandma’s house to say a final goodbye to family members.

“I felt like someone had pulled a plug on me and every tear inside was rushing out, if there was a forest fire somewhere all Smokey the Bear would have to do was hold me upside down over it and the fire wouldn’t have a chance.”

After weeks of silent retreat to his hiding place behind the couch back home in Flint, Kenny finally allows his emotions to come out. He cries when he sees his own young, sad face in the bathroom mirror, and Byron stays with him while he weeps. Kenny admits his guilt to Byron over leaving Joey to be taken by the Wool Pooh.