Adelaide: A Novel

Content Warning: This section discusses death by suicide, sexual violence and abuse, and the complexities of living with depression, anxiety, and bipolar disorder.

Adelaide’s relationship with Rory is the narrative lens through which the novel views the complexities of unrequited love. Adelaide struggles to feel valued in her relationship for several reasons. Her fantasies of romance are not realistic and therefore set her up for disappointment and dissatisfaction in her relationship. Her desperation to win Rory’s love stops her from acknowledging that he is not right for her and allows him to take her for granted, growing increasingly demanding and unkind.

Parts 1-9 trace the beginning and evolution of Adelaide’s entanglement with Rory and the relationship’s emotional and psychological effects on Adelaide. Because of Rory’s charm and resemblance to a “Disney prince,” Adelaide is quickly convinced that he is her soul mate. Their first outings feel “so swift, so laughably cinematic” that Adelaide gets caught in the idyllic romance of being with Rory (21). Her immediate comparison of the relationship to soulmates and cinematic romance illustrates her unrealistic expectations from the beginning. Adelaide’s love of the deeply romantic Call Me by Your Name reinforces her perspective. Even in retrospect, Adelaide knows that she “was always going to jump into this lake, no matter how dark or dangerous it might turn out to be” (24). The narrator likens the relationship to a body of water to capture its emotional depth for Adelaide. The relationship has a shimmering surface that draws her in and convinces her that she can fulfill her romantic dreams with Rory. Because Adelaide is a romantic at heart, she struggles to extract herself from the relationship even when Rory disappoints her. She still wants to believe in the version of love she thought she had found with him.

Rory’s failure to see, understand, and value Adelaide creates an imbalanced power dynamic in their relationship. Her doting on him further allows him to take her for granted. For example, when Rory ignores or fails to communicate with Adelaide, she feels as if Rory has “consumed her and discarded the scraps,” leaving her a “mangled carcass of a girl” (51). These metaphors capture the painful nature of unrequited love, in which Rory takes everything she offers but gives nothing in return. Adelaide is also more open about her feelings than Rory. She expresses her love for Rory multiple times without Rory returning the sentiment; after the relationship ends, she wonders if Rory even knew he loved her, suggesting that his lack of self-awareness gets in the way of his ability to understand or express emotions.

Meanwhile, Adelaide sacrifices time and energy whenever Rory needs her, despite his negligence, suggesting that no amount of generosity will change Rory’s behavior. In contrast, Rory never considers Adelaide’s needs or desires. He reaps the benefits of Adelaide’s attentiveness and never attempts to reciprocate her devotion. Over time, Rory’s power over Adelaide becomes increasingly apparent. When he’s grieving Nathalie, for example, he begins telling Adelaide that she’s disappointing him, even though he knows that he does not and cannot return her love. Through his failure to communicate his true feelings, the author suggests that a relationship without mutual love only becomes more lopsided as one party gives more and the other takes it. The unrequited dynamic exacerbates Adelaide’s sense of inadequacy, driving her to increasing insecurity and fear over the potential end of the relationship. Her unadulterated affection for a man who does not love her in return exacerbates her self-doubt and clouds her judgment of the relationship. Adelaide ultimately needs to separate from Rory in order to fully understand and reconcile the inequitable relationship. Though Rory disappoints her, liberating herself from him allows her to heal.